Entah kenapa, my mood today is not in its best.
It might started from yesterday afternoon, but in my chaotic scene I didn't really feel it. Gue ga bisa ikut media training karena satu dan lain hal. Lalu, siangnya gue jadi bete setelah I called up my sister's friend who turns out to be my office's client, dia malah cuek2 aja. Gue kan jadi malu sendiri, kayak sok oke aja. Then, I rushed in preparing the copies of proposal we planned to be presented to the client. Alhasil, printernya jadi ngadat, mati, ga mau ngeprint, while in the same time I have to make 7 copies, and it was 3 pm already, so it was confirmed that we were late. However, the meeting went well (that was the only one good thing). We went back to office and got stuck. Ended up by went home at 8pm.
In the morning after, which is this morning, I lost my patience when a bunch of official cars cut my way seenak udelnya aja. And when I try to cut them again as my revenge, I nearly hit the last car! In fact, I think I've scratch it! Sumpah gue sampe deg2an.
Siang menuju sore ini my bad mood is mounting.
Kerjaan gue ada yg salah karena kecerobohan gue sendiri. Kenapa sih hal sesepele itu aja gue salah? Cuma salah ketik doang! Nyebelin banget! Pembelaan gue adalah gue copy paste template dari yg udah ada, berarti ga sepenuhnya kesalahan gue dong? Therefore I was excused becuase I'm still new at this. Dan gue ga suka dengan pernyataan itu. Ini bukan masalah gue masih baru, tapi lebih karena habit gue. Gue lebih rela disalahin karena sesuatu yg emang muncul dari guenya, bukan karena gue masih baru (agak aneh memang, but it's me). Trus juga masalah lain muncul. Actually it is not a big deal, tapi entah kenapa gue sensi berat hari ini. Kerjaan yang menurut gue udah bagus ternyata masih belum bagus.
Abis break makin males aja gue. Pingin cepet2 pulang. Setelah bales beberapa email buat klien, mendadak boost tuh si bad mood. Pada saat yang ga tepat one of my friends appeared on YM, and I know for sure that he usually good at healing my bad mood. Unfortunately mungkin karena guenya yang udah ngaco berat, gue malah marah2 sama dia and I said a quite sensitive thing about friendship, which I really regretted it right after those words came out.
Setelah itu, he informed me that I might go without Ida to Korea, because she was in a bad condition since she has been to tired that it might cause danger to her liver. Dan gue jadi sedih. Gue tau untuk kebaikan dia emang dia ga boleh pergi, but it still disturbs me. And I know my trip would not be as interesting as before. But why she doesn't tell me anything? Kalimat gue sebelumnya agak harsh, so change it to: I prefer to say that gue agak 'menanti2kan' kabar. She has not reply my SMS. Hmm, I think she probably busy, or even in the middle of the sickness. Who knows? But again it contributes also to my negative mood.
At the top, jadinya malah many questions popped up on 'why'. I know it's no good. So not good. I think I have to take anger or patience management. Kenapa sih begini? Kenapa sih begitu? Kenapa sih, kenapa sih, dan kenapa sih. Semua kekesalan itu hampir tumpah ke temen gue yg ketemu di YM itu. Buntutnya gue malah jadi merasa bersalah, karena toh ini bukan salah dia.
Sorry, my friend, for also bringing you down with me.
It's just one of my 'black' day.
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